A man walks into a doctor's office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear.
"What's the matter with me?" he asks the doctor.
The doctor replies, "You're not eating properly."
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Doctor, doctor, I'm only four feet tall.
You'll just have to be a little patient
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Doctor, doctor, I'm suffering from amnesia.
Take these pills and you'll soon forget all about it.
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I asked my nephew whether he bought his wife anything for Valentine's Day.
"Yes", he said, "I bought her a belt and a bag."
"That was very nice of you", I replied, "I hope she appreciated the
thought."
He said, "So do I, and hopefully the vacuum cleaner will work better now."
Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a bell?
Take these and if it doesn't help give me a ring!
Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a dog.
How long have you felt like this?
Ever since I was a puppy!